This time of year is good for me, good for us all. It cleanses and removes electronic interference from the air in the form of lightning. People tend to forget the usefulness of that. I want to tell you a story, the story of how I got here, full of anxiety that threatens to disable my mind completely. Truth be told, Americans suffer more anxiety than people in devastated countries...if you look at the prescription list. Here's why.

Anxiety is uncontrollable and that is why it is called, anxiety. The sufferer knows that they are being punished by an unknown force, attacked literally from within and from without. There's just no hiding from an anxiety attack and trust me, I've tried. I think I've finally given up and will allow my husband to support me for as long as he is willing to try and I will simply stay at home to prevent harm to myself and/or others. All day, every day, fighting this horrid demon inside my soul that just won't let go, doesn't sleep and waits beside my bed for me to wake up each day. And al'ham'du'lillah, at least I sleep, I know there are many out there like me that don't.

What is the cause of my anxiety? I believe it is caused by a wayward naf that hates my guts and by definition, that nafs lives right inside of me. It's an untenable situation and the meaning of cathartic is to flush this miserable nut out of my body by writing the damn thing to death or drive it into the body of another by exorcism, self induced.